Friends

How good it is to have good friends. As a mother, we tend to not have much time for friends as we are putting so much time into work, family, soccer practice, cleaning a house, etc. But I think that's when we really need to carve the time for friends. Making friends in the good times of life, share a laugh, a cup of coffee, an invite for dinner.
Since I was young never developed many friendships. I was always the outcast of the popular group yet didn't fit in with the "outcast" outcast (I apologize, thinking in like teenager terms here). I was the rainy day friend I would say. I was only the person who would get called if it didn't work out to make plans with everyone else. I also moved a lot. ALOT! No, family was not military, we just moved every time the lease was up. It was hard to keep friends if I even made any. I also had been picked on, and bullied a lot from grade school - my freshman year of high school. And when you move all the time, yet every school you go to you are still being picked on and the outcast, it screams "there is something wrong with me!"
I had a lot of issues with being rejected and not valued so I think it kept me from making close friends into my adult life.

 However I long for all kinds of friendships. Deep close friends, friends that are great for shopping with, friends that are a joy to be around, friends that are fellow parents and some that are not..I would love to call someone last minute and meet them for lunch. A friend that knows your children almost as well as you do. A friend that you share everything with. Friends that you hang out with when you need a laugh, friends that are supportive when you need prayer or a listening ear. Friends that are going to be there for that birthday party or latest shindig. Friends that you share date night with.

I am just starting to find those friends. And part of it is opening up myself to others and part is stepping into their world or allowing them into yours (even if life doesn't look so pretty). Having friends in the good times also means that you will have friends and support when the storms of life come. I have spent too much of my life feeling terribly alone. When someone feels alone it becomes a playground for the enemy. The enemy has a way of whispering "no one likes you, you have no friends, you're not worthy of their friendship, or you're still the outcast".
Everyone needs friends. We need relationship. We need to be valued and show value. We need encouragement and we need to give encouragement. We need help sometimes and we serve as well. I had a fellow friend write about this on facebook this week. It must be in the air. People are looking!


I've heard some people (and pastors) say that sometimes you need to learn how to say "no" when it comes to doing things and activities and helping here and there. I get what they are saying, but I think in saying that there are about as equal amount of people who need to step it up too and make time for others and friends. Too many have gotten stuck inside of themselves and their own schedule and routine and don't ever step out of it because it would be out of that box. Reach out and call someone, make a point to connect with those that are an acquaintance or a friend that you've "been meaning" to catch up with. Carve out the time. Make it happen. If you have too many invites for plans or weekend happenings, then discern which ones would be the most important...maybe its not to the event where you know there will already be a bunch of people, maybe its to the friends house who has been really needing one or to the event you have never tried before or you notice doesn't have as many people going to. I bet you would make their day and find a new friend!!